Today was one of those days. I've been sick and my couch has been my place of existence. I get so stir crazy. I had to run a few errands and then it was back home to sit on my butt and wallow in self pitty. But first, I missed my exit. Just to listen to the rest of the song I was enjoying. The windows down, the breeze combing my hair, the air slipping through my fingers as I make waves out my window. I love driving and having no where to go. I can't even grasp how wonderful it is to have nothing to do. Of course it gets old, but so many busy people just wish they could go a day and not have a thing to do. Not a worry in the world. Pure bliss, for five minutes. That's a big deal. But see...I don't see it that way. I wish I had something to do. Somewhere to go. Someone to see. We all want what we cant have. And when we have it, it is not longer wanted.
I did it again today. I always sit around and wait for someone to ask me to do something. Then someone asks...and I make up a reason that I can't. I wish I knew why I did this. Until then I'll continue to push everyone away.
I want to write something good. But my heart isn't ready for that yet.
1 comment:
The last part. Of you pushing people away. Even though you know you are.
I feel.
the.
exact.
same.
feeling.
You aren't alone.
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